Self-care?

I've noticed the term 'self-care' tossed around a lot the past couple of years. I have to admit, I've struggled with the term itself; I think maybe it's a generational thing. I'm old enough to be a part of the generation that was mostly brought up to believe that to put yourself first is a bit selfish, and to consider others first and prioritize according to that.

I'm coming around to it though.

To be truly healthy means you're healthy in mind and spirit, as well as body. For whatever reason, the first two are easier for me to commit to. 

For my mind, I read - a lot - and I intentionally think on things that are positive. That certainly doesn't mean I don't have my moments, or DAYS, when I complain or act more like a Negative Nellie. But I do know, and understand, how it works: what you feed your mind will show up in your actions. 

For my spirit, this is probably the easiest for me. I draw my strength and inspiration from so many things connected to my spirit. Prayer first, of course, and also just staying in a constant state of awareness that His plans are so much grander and greater than my own. In my weakness, I am made strong. Many days, this is my lifeline, a comfort and a compass for me.

For my body - this has been a tougher nut to crack. It took me all of my 20s and a good part of my 30a to finally realize that my body is truly a temple, and that I should treat it as such. Overcoming body image issues, food issues, and - at last - accepting the body that I was gifted with, was not easily won. But once I grasped the fact that I only get one chance with this body, I was a much better steward of its care.

A few months ago, when I began experiencing tingling and numbness in my left hand, it was fairly easy for me to ignore. I blamed it on a prescription I had been given for a different ailment. 

When my lower back began to hurt Every. Day. I chalked it up to being on my feet all day, every day, and on concrete at that - in my new position as a Culinary instructor.

Then, when my neck and right shoulder began to ache and then become painful, I decided I was, indeed, pushing my body too hard. I would let up and give it some much needed rest after THIS. After THAT. 

self-care

Dictionary result for self-care

/ˌselfˈker/

noun

1. the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one's own health.

   "autonomy in self-care and insulin administration"

Until this week, when I couldn't take the pain any longer.

Turns out, I should have paid attention long ago. My childhood experience with scoliosis, coupled with early onset arthritis, and degenerative disk disorder are all staring me in the face this week. I had passed all my symptoms off to "aging." 

But - sometimes, people - it's more than simple aging. Sometimes, you're sick. Or, sometimes, you have a disorder. Or, sometimes, you have an injury. 

And you need to pay attention.

My body has my attention now. 

REVIEW: Girl, Wash Your Face

"Stop believing the lies about who you are so you can become who you were meant to be." - Rachel Hollis

I didn't purchase this book for me; it was never intended to be one of my reads for 52 Books in 52 Weeks.

I bought it to send to someone else. But - before I could put it in the mail - this same girl commented on a FB post how - on page 39 of the book she was currently reading - the words seemed to leap from the page and let her know it was time to take a leap of faith and go for what she wanted instead of trying to spend more valuable time trying to live up to what she felt others "expected" of her.

I immediately recognized the quote and realized she was already reading what had been laid on my heart for her. Confirmation.

So I added it to my bedside table stack, not really sure if I would ever pick it up. I think in my mind I pictured it to be more for the younger set. For whatever reason, I picked it up at one point and began to skim through.

Y'all.

It was SO good that I had to go back and start from Page 1. I have followed the author, Rachel Hollis, on Insta for a while, so I already knew her "voice" and was well aware of the wisdom of many of her tenants. This book, however, breaks it down into bite-size chunks that are truly life changing - if you are ready to change.

On the very first page of the Introduction, she pretty much sums up the book in one sentence. I could have stopped here and walked away with enough inspiration and excitement to go after the big dreams.

"You, and only you, are ultimately responsible for who you become and how happy you are."

With chapter titles such as: The Lie: Something Else Will Make Me Happy, The Lie: I Need to Make Myself Smaller, and The Lie: I'm a Terrible Writer - this book has challenged me in so many levels. In this year, where my "word" is PRESENT, and my decision to take a few new leaps of faith - stepping out and trusting that I will either fly or He will catch me, I am now convinced it was me - and not just my friend - that needed many of the words in this gem of a book. 

As women, life these days feels a whole lot like a marathon - and it feels a lot like we are out of shape and not at all prepared for the race. Whether time has truly sped up or not is debatable, but it definitely feels like we run faster and faster and accomplish less and less. Time is flying by.

I think about this all the time. Why didn't I take better care of my skin 20 or 30 years ago? Why didn't I lose all that baby weight 30 years ago when I was through having babies? Why didn't I begin my career - my passion career - much sooner, instead of in mid-life? Why couldn't I have had more wisdom, more confidence, more determination as a younger woman? 

Truth: All the steps, decisions, mistakes, victories throughout all of my years on this Earth have led me HERE. And I am really liking HERE. Not only does it not do any good to ask all of the what ifs, but it is directly counter-productive of what I am meant to do right now - in the NOW. Right HERE. Each of my scars, each of my heartbreaks, each of my losses have grown me as a woman. Each love I have had, each success - whether big or small - and each of my baby steps have led me to this season of life.

A season that I am very excited about. I am blessed, for sure.

So I'm going to wash my face, put all self-doubt behind me, and wrap my arms around my dreams, and my heart around my faith.

It's time to be what He intends for me to be in Him. His plans are so much larger and greater than my own. He believes in me; no, He KNOWS what I am about to tackle and accomplish. All I have to do is step out and trust, knowing that He has ordered my every step and already gone before me.

Hot Springs Getaway

Whispering Pines Tree House

Last year, in January, we had THE sweetest young couple choose Wildernest B&B for their "beginning of the year" getaway. They explained to us that they do this each year, a time to financial plan, have some of the hard conversations, and set both personal and couple goals for the upcoming year.

They very deliberately decided on a place away from home because - we all know - these types of conversations at home often become interrupted, or - dare I say truthfully - even heated? 

My sweet husband and I have taken a cue from them and are taking our "yearly planning" on the road this year. It didn't happen in January, but we are taking this Thursday and Friday off of work and traveling to Hot Springs, Arkansas - just a short hop down the road from us. After taking care of some necessary appointments/duties on Thursday, we'll hit the road and enjoy a couple of nights away to rest, plan, prepare, and set our financial goals for 2019.

This is a first for us, and we will definitely document this time and blog about it in the next few weeks. It doesn't matter if you're newlyweds, married with small children, empty nesters, or enjoying your "Pipe Dreams" like we are - having a PLAN and CONSISTENTLY working it together is just so important.

So...Whispering Pines, we will be tucked away in your part of YOUR piney woods in just a few short days, ready to rest, recharge, and plan. Our mutual couple goal for this year is to live intentionally, move forward with purpose, and take better care of our families, our children, and our grands!

Does anyone relate to this subject? Drop a comment if you want to share! If you'll leave a comment, we'll send you a little takeaway from Hot Springs upon our return!

Many blessings on this Sunday!

Networking...no, FRIENDworking:)

Today was one of those magical, I-can't-believe-it-actually-turned-out-better-than-I'd-hoped for days! We hosted our 2nd Annual Bridal Expo and "Shop our Shelves" at The Hitchin' Post today, and - y'all - it was So. Much. Fun!

My sweet husband worked so diligently and so HARD to make all of my visions for today become reality. Aaaalllll the heavy lifting and grunt work. My vendors not only showed up - but showed OUT - in the BEST POSSIBLE WAY! They engaged all of our guests and each and every booth (table) was alive with all the feels!

Here's a few pics of SOME of our vendors!

Jennifer Reynolds - Mary Kay

Mary Cyrus - Mary Cyrus Photography

Llona Hamilton  & daughter Kristina -
Truly Heavenly Events & Catering

Kinley Wilson - Sweet Cheeks Makeup
(I taught Kinley in English II AND she was on my debate team!:) Now a
full-time college student with an amazing side hustle!!

Kaitlyn Milby - Color Street Nails

Kellie Davis - Xyngular

Tommy Toys - Wedding Carriages

Madison, Taylor, & Kayla  - Danny Rateliff Salon (I taught Madison & Taylor their
sophomore year in high school!!!!) Now they are professionals doin' their thang!
PROUD teacher moments yesterday!)

And here are some of the glowing brides-to-be! I wish I would have managed to get pics of them ALL!!!

Our November couple - Cheslee & Brennan (and bridesmaid)

Kayla (on the right) and bridesmaid! Our APRIL wedding!!

Ashlen (on the right) One of my new friends and
already planning an epic wedding for 2020!

Bride-to-be Kinley (on the right! SO sweet!)

It was such a warm, heart-felt day with excited brides, their entourages, and vendors who are dear, dear friends of mine! Technically, I guess it's called "networking," but the magic that filled the venue today was a LOT more about 'friendworking!' Some came as strangers and left as friends. Friends came and left even closer.

To cap the day AND this blog post, here's a great picture of our November bride Cheslee and her soon-to-be-groom, Brennan, saying "YES to the The Hitchin' Post @Wildernest!"

Today was a truly perfect day! I'm greatly anticipating this year and all of the wonderful blessings it holds for the B&B, the venue, and for all of our friends!

All things BRIDAL, y'all!

I'm so uber EXCITED about this upcoming Saturday that I'm up preparing and blogging at 3 in the MORNING when I should be sleeping and resting up for it!

However...!

This Saturday, from 1-5pm, we here at the B&B are hosting our 2nd Annual Bridal Expo! It will be held at our venue, The Hitchin' Post, one of the best kept secrets in Northeast Texas (but hopefully not secret for much longer!)

We have SO much planned for soon-to-be brides with a set wedding date, for the upcoming brides that still have no clue as to a date OR a venue, and even for those "hopefuls" that a ring is in your near future! You do NOT have to be a Hitchin' Post bride to attend (although we hope you love us so much that you'll become one!:)

This is a totally free event, with 16 vendors who will be on hand for meet & greets, yummy catering and bakery samples, a DELUXE coffee bar, photo ops for you and your bride tribe, hair and makeup mini idea sessions, and amazing door prize giveaways!

And don't even get me started on the Swag Bags for each of the brides and/or potential brides!

For our Hitchin' Post brides that are already on our calendar, this is also the day you get to Shop Our Shelves!! As you already know, our decor (and we have LOTS of it!) is yours to "check out" and use the weekend of your wedding, free of charge. When you arrive, I'll arm you with your own clipboard and a listing of all of our wares. Take your time looking around, and make notes of each item you'd like to be on hand for YOUR "best day ever!"

We are all about taking the stress out of your big day! When you arrive to begin setting up, only the items you've checked out will be in the main room of the venue, making it simple and easy for you and your "team" to decorate and have fun while doing it!

So...we look forward to seeing you all here at the B&B in just a few short days!! Feel free to bring moms, your guys, and your bride tribe!

2019 Bridal Expo

The Hitchin' Post @Wildernest Bed & Breakfast

325 County Road 2512

Naples, TX 75568

Vendors:

Truly Heavenly Events - AMAZING catering

Mary Cyrus Photography - engagement, bridal, & wedding photography

Sassy Sisters - bridal cakes, groom cakes, decorated cookies and cake pops

Sweet Cheeks Makeup - bridal makeup, for bridal portraits AND the big day

Danny Rateliff - wedding event hair, bridal hair, and more

Color Street Nails - beautiful nails for the BIG day

Life is Sweet Confections by Ashlee - wedding cakes and more

Mary Kay - facial, hand & feet care, plus cosmetics

C & C's Creations - all things SIGNAGE

CC's Rustic Paparazzi Jewelry - jewelry for all of your wedding events AND the big day!

LimeLife - skin care and cosmetics

Pure Romance - perfumes, lotions, and LOTS of honeymoon ideas:)

Tommy Toys - wedding carriages

The Bohotique @Wildernest - bride and maids' robes, "BRIDE" beach hats, and more

Kellie Davis - Xyngular with ways to look and feel your best for your BIG DAY!

The Hitchin' Post - venue tours & Shop our Shelves

Wildernest Bed & Breakfast - cabin tours!

The heart of a teacher.

This blog post is dedicated to the many, many awesome teachers in my life - my dad before me, my brother, my current co-workers, my past co-workers, and to the many friends of mine who are teachers.

Today was one of those days that is hard on a teacher's heart.

I just walked in from attending the funeral of a 12 year old - one of our 7th grade junior high girls. Bright, pretty, spunky, athletic, with a love of singing...we never anticipated this.

I've "lost" several students in my years of teaching; it's something that never gets easier. It's one of the great many things that college courses do not prepare you for. Being a teacher is a lot like motherhood - you walk around most days with your heart outside of your body.

This precious girl was not a student of mine; her sibling is in our building, and that carries its own weight of grief. But - even more than that - our district is small, our community is small; each loss is felt. The school auditorium (where the memorial service was held) was packed; this is a community where people show up, they are there for one another. I sat in the back row and was overwhelmed with the display of unity and love that was, both, felt and seen.

As I left my classroom this afternoon and began the short walk to the auditorium, I was overtaken with emotion as I paused at the junction where our junior high and high school meet. Right as I was passing by, the junior high students were being led by a whole host of their teachers down the hallway, toward the memorial service for their classmate. Let me tell you, if that scene doesn't bring you to your knees, I'm not sure anything would.

I don't want to "camp out" on this next part, but I do feel it's worth speaking to. The majority of the students we lose are to car accidents, and occasionally a terminal illness. This one...this was a first for me and for many that I teach with. This...was a suicide. Remember, she was 12.

That, in itself, sparks a grief that is hard - as a teacher - to wrap your head and heart around; imagine how difficult it is for the classmates. The pastor conducting the service did such an amazing job - truly one of the most heart-felt, anointed messages I've heard at a funeral. Heartbroken himself, he spoke directly to the family, but also to all of the students. There is a lot of healing and restoration that needs to happen, and he spoke to that and began that process today by pointing folks to Jesus.

When nothing at all makes sense, go to Him.

I rarely go here, mainly because I feel like it is really no longer my story to tell, but like several of the students that I currently teach, I have been touched first-hand by attempted suicide. Fortunately, this person was not successful. But - as a young 24 year old, I know what it's like to receive THE call, to read THE note, and then to spend all day and all night in a hospital room, hoping, praying, BEGGING that somehow, someway life could just go back to being "normal."

But you know what?

It doesn't. You eventually lean into, and then embrace, a new normal. One in which you are no longer the same. You are wary when you never used to be. You look for "signs" at the first appearance of distress or unhappiness. There is a huge, jagged scar that eventually heals, but its presence serves as a constant reminder: life can change at any moment.

I was young, and probably naive in many ways. I had - up until this point - led a pretty sheltered and "untouched" life. The mother of two small little boys, my "one moment" grew me up quickly. The world no longer felt safe, and I didn't know how to stay safe myself, much less keep two toddlers safe.

And that is how - even though I spent all of my growing up years on a church pew - I came to really know Jesus for myself. When nothing made sense, I went to Him, and that has made all the difference in my life since.

If you would, please keep this precious family, our school family - especially her teachers and classmates - and our entire community in your prayers over the days and weeks and months to come. These times tend to have a rippling effect, and we (teachers) must put our own grief, our own disbelief, our own horror aside and be what these kids need.

We will be there to hand out hugs, listen when they need to talk, understand when the school work just isn't getting done, and - most importantly - point them to Jesus.

Because - when nothing makes sense, He always does.

REVIEW: Chase the Lion

"If your dream doesn't scare you, it's too small!" - Mark Batterson

When I signed on to accept the 52 Books in 52 Weeks Challenge, I put out a FB request, wanting to know what books others would  recommend. I was astounded at the number of really great suggestions that came flooding in, and I've already lapped up several of the titles like a dry sponge craving water!

Chasing the Lion was recommended to me by my dear friend, Jennifer. I immediately ordered it from Amazon and pretty much inhaled it in great gulps right after it arrived.

It's an easy read, but SO chock full of tidbits of wisdom and goodness, that I find I go back and reread passages again and again.

The book opens with "The Lion Chaser's Manifesto," and I return to the lines in this passage again and again:

Quit living as if the purpose of life

is to arrive safely at death.

Run to the roar,

Set God-sized goals. Pursue God-given passions.

Go after a dream that is destined to fail

without divine intervention.

Stop pointing out problems. Become part of the solution.

Stop repeating the past. Start creating the future.

Face your fears. Fight for your dreams.

Grab opportunity by the mane and don't let go!

Live like today is the first day and last day of your life.

Burn sinful bridges. Blaze new trails.

Live for the applause of nail-scarred hands.

Don't let what's wrong with you

keep you from worshipping what's right with God. 

Dare to fail. Dare to be different.

Quit holding out. Quit holding back. Quit running away.

Chase the lion.  (Batterson)

If you are harboring dreams that you feel are God-given, but that you've kept under protective care - for whatever - reason: fear of rejection, fear of failure, it seems much too pie-in-the-sky...whatever the reason, this book challenges you to - instead - listen to the dream God has placed inside of you and then step out in faith.

It has been so timely for me to read this, in these first few weeks of the new year, because these have been my very thoughts. How do I move beyond what I feel I'm called to do, and MAKE IT HAPPEN? 

Now I know the answer is this: stay focused, don't give up, walk through open doors, say "no" to the non-urgent and allllll the YES's to things attached to your God-size dream. Take it one day at a time. One step at a time. 

Trust.

Work hard.

Pray even harder.

Live your life honestly and authentically, taking care FIRST of the hearts who've been entrusted to your care. Love them, care for them, uplift them...be present for them. By saying "no" to the unnecessary, you have more time for chasing the lion - your God-given dream.

So here I am...putting on my best running shoes, piling my hair into a messy bun, putting on my game face...going after MY LION in 2019!!!

Newest love of mine!

If you've been following the blog for the past few weeks, you'll already know that I've been looking at what is best for the future of The Bohotique @Wildernest. My year of keeping clothing, household goods, caps, bridal accessories, tshirts, etc., in inventory turned out to be a bit much for us.

YET:) I feel pretty strongly about keeping it going at some level because of all of the positive love we've received from our customers and guests here at The B&B. The challenge has been to look honestly at what does well in our little niche boutique and then concentrate just on that.

We've decided to streamline in 3 areas: Bridal accessories, which will be available both on site and online, NDULGE - which I am merely an influencer for - and THIS...Cleerely Stated inspirational card sets. Truly, if I were to create a line myself, this would SO. BE. IT.  Instead, I give all kudos and all the hearts to Cleere Cherry (is that not the coolest name EVER?!?) who has created an entire inspirational line that is so utterly phenomenal.

I am pretty much obsessed by it.

I began as a customer, but now I am a wholesale distributor of her products.

These inspirational card packets come packaged in ways that make my heart so happy and - when you untie the ribbons and open the package themselves, the cards are just...beyond lovely. I started with the "Make His Day" set - a whole package of uplifting and encouraging notes, scriptures, and quotes that you can tuck into your hubby's lunch, his travel bag, or just leave for him to find next to his sink in the mornings.

I moved on to "Compliment Cards" - colorful little cards that you can slip into a gift, on a co-worker's desk, or hand out to students. Sometimes it's the smallest tokens that carry the most influence. What more could we want than to make those in our world and under our care feel special and loved, even when we are not with them?

Cleere's line is a lot more extensive than this and - if you want to check it out for yourself, start here. The Bohotique @Wildernest will begin carrying her line with the following products (more to come in the next couple of months):

• Compliment Cards
• Make Her Day
• Make His Day
• Bright Notes for Bright Minds

You may begin ordering these four products as of 8pm tonight. You will find them in the SHOP portion of our B&B website. I challenge you to order a pack and start handing out bits of happy on the regular! 

PLEASE, let me know what you think about this line! I am uber excited about it and I am greatly anticipating carrying the entire line by the end of May. But I value YOUR thoughts so very much. Drop a comment and tell me what you think and how you'd use them! 

To kick things off, I'm doing a giveaway - a set of Compliment Cards! Watch the IG story later tonight, like it, tag a friend, and then leave a comment HERE, at the end of this blog post. We'll have a computer generated random drawing tomorrow at 5, and I will announce who can excitedly stalk their mail box for this little packet of all things happy! 

Happy MLK Day! {Praise hands allllll the way up for a much-needed day off after the week the teachers in my district had last week, and have to look forward to this week.) Blessed beyond measure to work with a great group of educators who love kids passionately. 

Present.

PRESENT.

This morning the story of Ruth was on my mind; I even posted a devotional meme that talked of Ruth not going back to what was familiar. Because of this - and because she stepped out in faith and walked into the unknown - she came face-to-face with her divine destiny.

If any woman ever had a reason to look back, and even go back, it was Ruth. No one would have blamed her. No one would have thought her weak or scared or wrong. She would have been doing the natural thing, the human thing. That thing that we all do at times when life is overwhelming, or the choices are too hard, or the decisions are too scary. We go back to what we know. To where we feel the safest.

But Ruth decided to be PRESENT, and because of that, her life was never the same.

One evening last week, I spent about an hour on the phone with someone so very precious to me. Young enough to be my daughter, and yet possessing the talent and wisdom and grace of someone so much older, she is a true inspiration to me. I listened as she "talked out" things that were on her heart and decisions that lay ahead of her. It's in those moments that I think I pray the hardest, "Lord, give me the right words to say. Don't let ME get in the way." When she had talked and I had listened, only one phrase ran through my heart, and then my head, and finally out of my mouth.

"Faith walk it."

Walk it out.

This applies to most all of us. There are times when we come face to face with that choice: play it safe, or faith walk it. Lay it all out there. Put that talent to use. Let your heart feel. Make the decision that doesn't necessarily make sense to others. Go with what you know and trust.

In the introduction to The Lipstick Gospel by Stephanie May Wilson (review coming soon!), Stephanie addresses the two types of people in this world: the people with a map and those without one. Both ways can bring you to places of great beauty, and they can also both carry you through arduous times. For the planners (raising my hand high here, because I fall more deeply into this category than the other) you at times arrive to your destination only to realize it looks nothing like you thought it would. And sometimes when you don't plan at all, you still manage to stumble upon something more perfect than you would have ever picked out for yourself.

There's not a right or a wrong, even though the extremes of each find it really hard to understand the other! LOL:) Either way can lead to beauty. Both ways can lead to heartache. The decision lies inside of us, with that still, small voice that directs when we can release control enough to listen. Truly listen.

And then faith walk whatever it is that He speaks to us.

It's in these moments that we are truly, reverently PRESENT.

My word for this year is just that. PRESENT. Let me be like Ruth. Let me not play it safe, just because of fear or uncertainty, or because I might fail. Let me be messy, but beautiful in His sight. Let me be bold, but only because what lies ahead is worth the extra effort. In short, let me move forward despite my fears, insecurities, and - in those times when I am unsure of the next step - let me not be afraid to pause, to rest, to reset, and then begin to move forward again.

Just don't let me look back.

Let me be present this year. In the lives of the ones I love the most. In the wake of the dreams I pursue. In the hearts of those who need me to be strong. Let me show up. Do the hard work. Take advantage of opportunities that others view as risks. View a closed door as a reason to venture out an open window. Or time to dance in the hallway while I wait...

Let this planner be diligent, aware, and wise, but don't let me miss the spectacular because of fear of stepping outside of my comfort zone.

Let me be...

PRESENT.

MANUSCRIPTS: Melrose Miracle

Remember last Saturday when I was soooo emotional about The Finding of the Manscripts?

LOL.

I'll attempt to explain why.

A number of years ago, I was a full-time writer. Just saying that makes me still cringe a bit. But not nearly as much as I used to cringe when someone would refer to me as a "writer" or "author," although both were true.

For close to 8 years I devoted the majority of my days to my craft, my passion, my calling. I wrote. Four of my completed manuscripts made it to publication. The first two will forever be special just simply because a small secular publishing house took a chance on a newbie.


If I had the opportunity to revise these two titles today, I would know so much more about character development, plot twists, about being one with your characters.

Still, by God's grace and mercy, These Things We Hold and For Such a Time as This found their publishing home. A few years later, Waking Emma and Saving Grace also found a publishing home. Mind you, this all took place years ago; before I went back to college for my teaching certification, before we moved to rural Northeast Texas, before my teaching career, and definitely before we opened the B&B!

Over the years since, I've often all but forgotten about those days. Days when I would plop in front of my computer after the boys left for their day at school. Days when I would become so involved in my characters' lives that I would have a difficult time transitioning back to my "real world" at the end of the day in order to make dinner, keep house, be a "present" wife and mom, and raise a family.

Once I began school, and then teaching, I all but gave up writing. The occasional blog post was about as far as I ventured into the writing arena in those days. By this time, I had grown somewhat frustrated with the industry and the difficult journey it is to "break into" mainstream publishing. I - by then - had several more manuscripts completed, as well as book proposals that I was insanely excited about - but I was no longer confident that writing was a calling; maybe it was just my hobby.

It seemed that writing had become WORK and much of my previous joy was robbed by the rejection letters, the return of my beloved Melrose Miracle by my equally beloved AGENT (yessss, I actually was under contract with an agent!:), and by the rigorous guidelines and stipulations required to succeed in a very up and coming and competitive industry - that of Christian fiction.

I remember the day I packed up the binders, saved all the manuscripts and proposals to a flash drive, and then stored them all. I truly felt that this "season" of my life was behind me. I knew I wanted to hang onto all of the things from this time period, but I was not a good steward of keeping up with where they were. This was particularly true after several moves, until we settled on the 50 acres of land that we now call the B&B.

Then, a number of months ago, that sleeping giant awoke inside of me and - y'all - I. CAN'T. STOP. WRITING. It's joyful again, healing, even, and I write with abandon, not giving one single thought to trying to become published again. I'm writing for me, to deliver myself of the many stories bottled up inside of me, begging to find their home in word form.

When I switched from teaching English to Culinary this school year, and realized that my Advanced Culinary was made up of all females, Melrose Miracle came to mind. The story of Ella and Luke, a nation-wide Cooking Channel contest - "Restaurant 101" - and a 2nd chance at love and laughter, the perfect combination to share with my culinary ladies.

Except I could not find the binder holding the hard copy. I could not find the flash drive. I couldn't find it online anywhere - even though I had posted it one chapter at a time on an old blog back some years ago. The thought of it BEING GONE was devastating to me.

Days became weeks and weeks became months and still no manuscript.

When I had all but given up, my precious, sweet, unbelievably supportive husband (no matter what kind of shenanigans I find myself in, he never fails to have my back:) spent time searching the very, very back of a very, very packed storage room in the barn...and he found Ella and Luke!!!  (All the praise hands here!)

This binder with this old manuscript of mine now resides in my classroom. I'm not sure when I'll share it with the girls - maybe as a part of their graduation gift...

In the meantime, I'm having the best time reading the novel (my novel!) and even though it never found its home, I can't help but believe that this was all a part of a bigger plan. A plan much bigger, and most likely better, than I could have created or dreamed on my own.

I'm so thankful - so grateful - for so very much these days.

I'm excited for what is happening in my heart as I spend my evenings tucked into my chair in front of my laptop. Just because it feels like home again. 

Much like Ella experienced:

She'd entered this contest on a dare, never in a million years thinking she'd be chosen as a finalist. Then she'd traveled to LA in pursuit of a distant dream, an opportunity to carve out a delicious future for her and Chloe.

But she'd discovered so much more.

Luke Abney had claimed her heart with a gentleness that left Ella breathless. His warmth and tenderness reached inside her to a place Ella thought had withered away when Stephen died. In a short span of time, Luke had taught her two valuable things.

 How to trust her heart again.

And how to trust God again. (Wilder, Melrose Miracle)

Trusting Him with all of my heart, for all of my tomorrows...

The Giving Box

 "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give."

---Winston Churchill

Every Christmas since they were old enough to understand, Amy & Paul have taken our grands - Carter & Kendall - to serve Meals on Wheels on Christmas Day. Of all the many, many things I love, appreciate, and admire about our grown children, perhaps the biggest of these is that they live life on purpose.

Somehow they have realized (at a much younger age than we did) that a life well lived is a life where you are aware; aware of your blessings, but also aware of the lack of food, lack of health, lack of money, and lack of family that so many around us experience.

Living a life OF purpose is wonderful and great, and I think it's something that most "thinking" people do. We want to know that we are making a difference in this world, and not just existing. We want our lives to impact someone and - when all is said and done - we want to know that our life meant something. That we are leaving an imprint of our heart and efforts behind. 

But living life ON purpose, I believe, takes it a step further. I don't know that we "think" about this nearly as much as it is just a part of who some people are. They have a way of keeping "the main thing" THE main thing. They are present in their life and show up for all the right moments. Busyness, obligations, and appointments still dot their daily lives, but never seem to outshine or overpower what they believe to be the most important: taking care of those who aren't necessarily able to care for themselves. 

Over the past few weeks of partnering with ndulge, I've seen firsthand how easy they make it for most any of us to begin to change our perspective from JUST living a life of purpose to living life ON purpose. A company founded by a group of sisters, ndulge seeks to not only provide quality athleisure wear, beauty and wellness products, and accessories (that we are all going to buy anyway), but they stand behind their words and give back 33% to a variety of causes that each involve helping people not as fortunate as they are.

If you want to hear an inspirational story, then you need to read Kennedy's story. Just as Paul and Amy started our grands out early, so did the parents of these girls. So much so, that as they grew and again and again witnessed first hand the power of giving, they sought out ways to make it a permanent part of their daily lives. 

They decided to live life ON purpose. 

One of the products I am most excited about is The Giving Box. Much like the now-popular "box of the month" clubs (except this is a one-time purchase that you can repeat as often as you'd like), you receive a box of ndulge products (worth well over $100) that you will not only LOVE and wear all the time, but the money from the box will go directly to impact and affect the lives of at least two people. 

You may be thinking, two people, well, that doesn't sound very impactful. But it's a movement, a deliberate step after step after step approach to changing lives in very specific ways. I'm excited - and honored - to be a part of this company and to be able to share some good in a world so desperately in need of true folks to be the "hands & feet" of Jesus during a time when it is all too easy to get caught up - and remain caught up - in the hecticness, the hurry, the frenzy that is LIFE. 

As I announced on IG and Facebook this morning, I have a few giveaways that I want to send out this week! Leave a comment here on the blog, sharing a favorite quote, or maybe an inspirational GIF or meme...something that is in keeping with Winston Churchill's words: "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give," and you will be entered into a random drawing for the AMAZING Hearts for Giving bracelets, made with love and very little money by the women who give of their time, energy, and resources to aid the Prerana Orphanage of Love in Nepal.

Tonight - at 8:00pm Central time - I will draw names for these giveaways, and then send some of this happiness that I have discovered your way! Comment away on social media, but - remember - the names for the drawing will come from the comments left here on this post!

Until this evening...

Blessings, 

Staci

When NO is what gets you there.

Whether it has something to do with the "first child" syndrome, or whether I am just a pleaser by nature, saying NO does not come easy for me. In fact, up until recently, I would find 100 other ways to attempt to say no (to a project, to an obligation, to an event, to a person) but I quickly discovered that some people don't "hear" those other ways.

They have to hear, "No," to know it means NO.

Saying that one simple little word shouldn't be so difficult. But for many people - including me - it brings on such a sense of guilt; as though I am letting someone or something down.

I wish I would have realized a long time ago that I don't have that kind of power. :) People's happiness and satisfaction in this life isn't directly proportional to me being at their beck and call, no matter how it appears in the moment.

"You can't have a yes without a no." (Niequist) We all have limitations on our time, our energy, and our resources. Saying "yes" too often to things that don't inspire us, motivate us, or bring about any kind of self-respect or self-gratitude only means that we are simultaneously saying "no" to some things that do inspire us, do motivate us, and do provide us with a sense of self-respect.

I've come to realize over the latter portion of 2018 that I've said "no" too many times, but to the wrong people, the wrong things. I've passed on weekends with family to work an event or fulfill a sponsorship. I've lost sleep and just plain 'ol rest to show up when I'd rather stay home, to make someone's job easier while making mine more difficult.

As I went from a young mom, to a working mom, then to a single mom, then to a blended family mom, then a "going back to college mom," and finally - a full-time career mom, I gradually became accustomed to saying yes to all the things.

I imagine, at first, this was because I felt that I somehow lacked something, something that I needed to compensate for. Maybe I felt "less than" because of the struggle to provide for two little boys in an average paying job. Maybe I felt that since I could no longer be THE room mother, that I should instead make all of the things. The cupcakes. The schedules. The goody bags.

I remember coming home from one work trip a day early. I didn't tell anyone about the change of schedule except for Mike. I came straight home from the airport, changed into sweats and a tshirt, climbed into bed, and simply requested that I be excused from the phone, from interaction with people, from even the things that should have brought me the most fulfillment.

I just wanted to lay in bed.

It wasn't depression, or even despondency. It wasn't just a matter of being physically, mentally, or even emotionally tired. I was just tapped out. Out of reserves. Out of anything to give for the moment.

In hindsight, that should have been my turning point, but - of course - it wasn't. I was still young - in my early 30s - and felt that things might literally crumble if I wasn't hands on 24/7 in everything I was expected to do. Everything I was asked to do. Everything I thought I should do. 

I was working so hard, moving so fast, taking on so much that I hadn't even realized I was losing out on the things that really mattered. The moments. Those brief pockets of time when memories are made.

I suppose I thought it would all lead me to where I eventually wanted to be - at my destination. Where I was meant to be. Equipped with what I needed to be successful in life. What I didn't realize was that I was robbing not only myself, but those I loved most, of the best of me.

Not everyone will be thrilled about your decision to suddenly be protective of your time, your talent, and your energy. It may "inconvenience" some people who've become reliant on you - quite simply put - just being there for them. 

Hear this: those are NOT YOUR PEOPLE.

The folks who truly love you, treasure you even, want your happiness. They want you to have a peaceful, fulfilling life, and they trust you to make the decisions that ensure that is what happens. These people are not threatened by your absence, their feelings are not hurt by your saying 'no.' They will respect your decisions. They will respect your needs.

They will respect YOU.

If we listen, we all have that inner voice that guides our way. For many of us, this is certainly through prayer, and it is also through using what God gave us: the ability to listen to our bodies, and to respectfully care for this one vessel He's given us to live in. After all, it has to take us to the finish line.

We own a B&B!

Interior of The Boho House, taken by a guest turned friend!

To be an enthusiastic Bed & Breakfast owner, I sure don't blog much about it, do I?!? :) I'm going to attempt to do better.

The reason for the lack of B&B content is probably because I value our guests, and their time with us, so very much that I never want any of them to think we are taking advantage of their experiences here by writing about them. But the reality is that there is so much goodness that we reap from the people who choose to trust our little rural B&B for their getaway!

We have former guests that have become friends we'll have for life. People like Opie & Mary Cyrus. Denise Craig. Cory & Jessica Gonzalez. Daniel & Savanna Tuesburg. The list goes on and on.

When we first opened The Cabin and established ourselves as business entity, we had no earthly idea that one of the very best rewards of being inn keepers was the folks you'd meet and come to love. There's a connection you make when staying at a bed & breakfast that you don't usually get at hotel stays. (Not that I don't love a good hotel stay from time to time!!)

We do our best to follow our guests' lead and engage in conversation when they desire it, but also grant them as much privacy as they might want as well. What tends to happen is that an authentic relationship begins to take root and - whether they become repeat customers or just guests that opt to "stay in touch," our lives are made so much richer due to the people who trust Wildernest with their stay.

Of course, as I'm sure ANY B&B owner can laughingly attest to, we also have some STORIES! LOL. Things that will never make the blog! We have seen just about everything. Heard just about everything. Found just about everything!

If you are new to B&B stays, or are just interested in a really great article about them, this read provides great info, as well as the names of "quirky" or niche B&Bs that offer some...um...amenities...that you won't find here.

But if it's a warm and comfortable stay, in the cutest cabins in the woods, with a one-of-a-kind breakfast crate delivered to your front porch each morning, please give us a try! We love what we do, we genuinely care about our guests' stays, and we absolutely love it when a guest becomes a friend.

A nostalgic look back at our 2018 weddings at the venue!

Oh. my. gracious, y'all.

I knew we had a dozen gorgeous and completely unique weddings here at The Hitchin' Post this past calendar year. I attended several of them, and helped out with a majority.

Yet it wasn't until I sat down and began to put together this video that I realized JUST what a banner year it really was! I have to say, I teared up once I'd completed it and then watched it from beginning to end the first time.

So. Many. Memories.

Beautiful, heart-warming, once-in-a-lifetime memories. And to think that Mike and I were privileged enough to have a front row seat (figuratively speaking) at these unions is humbling. We are so thankful to our brides and grooms for trusting us with their BEST. DAY. EVER!

Enjoy the video!

Transplanted gal.

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong but sometimes it is letting go." - Hermann Hess

I'm a bit of a control freak. For those of you who know me well, I know what you are thinking. What an understatement! I like to know where I'm going. I enjoy knowing where my things are. I'm comforted by the familiar. I'm energized by routine.

A few years back, all of the nuances that make up who I am kind of went on a flying leap out the nearest window. We moved from a lively, happening suburban neighborhood in DFW to a sleepy, laid-back town in rural Northeast Texas.

In short, I became a transplanted gal.

I believe in seasons of life, and I had no doubt that this was the season for change. It was a time of letting go of what felt familiar, and - instead - dive headfirst into this new direction. I have no regrets.

Little did I know then that this was just the beginning...

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power." - Alan Cohen

Ah, how this quote spoke to me this morning. Preached to me, is more like it.

I - like most women - value security. There's comfort in the familiar, reassurance in the mundane. We know what to expect, and pretty much when to expect it. While this life runs the risk of skating dangerously close to BORING, I have to say that I prefer this ride over the wildly unpredictable roller coaster of the UNKNOWN.

But sometimes the normal - the FAMILIAR - can breed mediocrity and we begin to give less than our very best. When we finally get brave enough to truly face the situation with clarity we can then - and only then - summon the courage to venture into the newer, unfamiliar waters. It is only there that we can meet newer, more mature challenges. And, really, it's the challenges that promote personal growth. And personal growth is what we all need, isn't it? Once in those waters...I agonize.

I might weep. Grieve, even. My spirit and my soul lay claim to my every thought and action. I don't want to make a change. Even so, life is all about change. In no way at all do I want to miss out on what God has for me for fear of the unknown. With hesitancy, I feel myself being drawn to the deep.

I allow the waters to suck me into their uncertain depths.

I may retreat for a while. Retreat from all the noise, all the distractions, all the pulls of the world around me. I might share with no one the conflicting and warring emotions tugging for proprietorship in my soul. I enclose myself in the only place I know will bring healing and hope for my bruised spirit.

And then I pray.

You know the kind of prayers I'm talking about. The ones that seem to claw their way from the innermost parts of your being. The ones where words elude you, fail you, yet you pray on, your spirit interceding for the human being that you are. But it's only in those moments of uncertainty, of brand-spanking newness that you somehow sense that in your trevail you are giving birth to something new.

So I surrender.

Once in the murky, uncertain waters of what I once perceived as scary territory, I discover treasures. Pieces of beauty that I would never have seen otherwise. My eyes adjust to the dimness of the situation and I become quiet. Be still, and know that I am God. Verses from the Bible become my food. Lyrics from songs become a healing balm for my soul. Worship - although often wordless - brings a quenching to my thirst.

After a while, I realize I no longer flail at the water surrounding me. No longer struggle against the lessons these depths are trying to teach me. Acceptance, slow yet persistent, begin to inch their way into my consciousness. And then the AMAZING...

...the healing of soul and spirit comes to me.

I break the surface again, and breathe in great gulps of fresh peace. I'd gone under in a black-and-white world, but now the colors around me bloom with vibrancy and brilliance and techni-color supremacy. The scales are gone from my eyes, the pain gone from my heart, and doubt gone from my spirit.

I am different. Yet the same. I've released the familiar. Yet I'm more comfortable than ever before. I stand still and know. I have moved into the deeper waters. I have security that cannot fail.

The changes have come closer together these past few years, and especially these past few months. I've noticed less pause in my spirit and more excitement in my step. Maybe this means I'm trusting the process more; maybe it means I've gleaned some much needed wisdom finally.

I've started referring to each new phase as "walking it out..."

It's a faith walk.  Always.

I am no closer to knowing my future. And yet my future feels solid.

Some dreams may come true. I may have to bid good-bye to still others. There will no doubt be days that appear cloudy and uncertain. There will be days when the familiar once again blankets me, lulling me into a complacent existence that feels wonderful, but has the potential to stagnate the growth that I crave. And then it will be time for my focus to change again.

All that I am, all that I hope to be, is in HIM.

That's it for me. Nothing else matters. There's comfort in that. It's familiar. Yet it's ever-changing, pulling at me, tugging on my heart's door - begging me to come deeper still.

And so I will. I'm letting go and moving willingly into the deeper waters.

And in that movement I'll know power.

And in that power, I'll know LOVE.
And love brings LIFE.
And LIFE is all we have here so why not embrace it with all we have?

The "lost" manuscripts.

"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." 

        -Maya Angelou

This morning has been an emotional time for me. Up early to give a venue tour, and then ready a couple of the cabins for weekend guests, I was completely focused on the business, and on finishing up the duties so that I could head back to the house. Our oldest son, Nate, and his wife, Sarah, are visiting this weekend, and we have a full day and evening planned with them. 

But as I said good-bye to the prospective bride and the group of ladies with her, I saw Mike (who was in the barn) waving me over to him. As I drew closer, I glimpsed a large cardboard box sitting on top of his 6-wheeler and my heart sped up a bit.

Could it be...?

"Did you find them?" Even as I asked the question, I saw the happy gleam in his eyes and knew that he had, in fact, found THEM.

My "lost" manuscripts. 

He opened the box and I stared down at binder after binder after binder, filled with my words, stories that I had poured out onto paper so many years ago. Through all of our moves and our transitions (and my transplantations:) I had put my writing in my past, boxed away. 

I remember the day I boxed all of the binders. I truly thought my writing career was behind me, that it had been but a "season," although one of the more impacting ones of my life. For five years, while the boys were in high school and beginning college, I was fortunate enough to work from home and I wrote every. single. day. 

Four of my novels made it to the publishing stage, and still several more lay complete, without a permanent home, inside of binders, where I had carefully printed out each story as I reached the end and...then put it away.

For a number of weeks now, I have been searching for these manuscripts. Mike and I have each spent more than a couple of late, late nights, searching closets, combing through all of our old computer files...looking for any sign that those days spent at the computer still existed somewhere.

In future blog posts, I'll talk more about a couple of them and why it is so important to me RIGHT NOW to find them. But - for today - I will just share that my dear, sweet husband found them. After I sat in the office and opened binder after binder, I became overwhelmed - with gratitude, with love, with hope, and with excitement...

I walked into the kitchen, where he was cooking breakfast for us and the kids and - even though Nate and Sarah sat in the living room just feet away from us, I stood at the stove and wrapped my arms tight around his waist. He held me close as I buried my head in his chest, helpless to stop the flow of tears as they ran hot down my face. 

"Thank you," I was barely able to get the words out in between gulps.

"Mom," Sarah's voice held concern. "Are you okay?"

I am way, way more than just okay. I feel like a piece of my heart - no, my soul, has been returned to me. I am looking forward to the days ahead, and what they hold. For me, for my characters, for our family...

...for this new season that I feel blowing in my direction, ever so gently...